--Edited--
frustrated...
I'm about to burst...
the reasons may look simple or stupid for some people, but when small things gather, they make up a huge mountain of pain heavy on the heart... get triggered sometimes when another tiny stupid thing comes..
you'll feel like crying non-stop, but you'll hold back.... since the others will not understand your pain and why you became like this.....
----
I'm tired, very tired...
sometimes, I really wish to have a room of my own... alone.. I feel very so right now.
I'm someone who tends to usually have a smile on her face, try to take everything easy, rarely talk in a high tone, try to stay active and refreshing as possible.
I try not to complain.. not to annoy the others around me or make them unnecessarily worried...
but there it comes. the time when I just can't hold it in any longer, but again -as I'm not used to express my self- I don't like the idea of making such a dramatic scene in the public...
still, I NEED to cry out my feelings.. I noticed that I tend to be of the stressed type people.. I'm afraid I may grow white hair in my head! it's true that i don't give a lot of care to my looks, but I'm still a young girl, so even if my wisdom brain - =P - didn't give it any importance, my young soul will keep fighting till it wins the war- only in my head though, nothing improves in the outside >_>;-... the conclusion, yes, I worry about my looks <_<"
I.... what with the wars talk? I'm getting a bit out of the topic..
I also figured out that I'm a person who is lazy, slow or may not do/ accomplish her duties or do something..... but it doesn't mean that this person is relaxed and having fun with her leisure time.my head keeps building up the stress and blames everyday, making me feel Suffocated.. angry at my self.. want to scream...
mostly I deserve it... so I sincerely try my best -it's like treating a disease- to correct my self...
but there are these things about my self.... well, I don't know but... I just don't want to change them, though I may do that when I feel the need of it... even though they make me worried all the time...
still,... I can't adjust my self.. or actually, I don't want to.. at least, not now... it's exhausting me, even if you didn't say it, I can feel your unsatisfaction... so please.. please spare me... I can't be that perfect.. I wish to be, but I know that I won't... you may try to talk in a general way, but I'm sensitive stupid girl who can let such feeling pass without being unaffected... I'm an idiot, can't I be more cold, no it's not like that.. I'm really an idiot... it was a normal thing to be said.. so yeah, I'm stupid, honestly, I can't believe how ridiculous I can be.. please forgive that of me,... it's just become that tiny trigger... so you're not to be blamed... it's all my own fault..
I really wish to have my own only room. where I can be by myself, without any kind of interruptions. I don't like crying locked in the bathroom..
sadly, I don't even know how to scream!.... and of course, I can't speak my feelings loud in front of someone who knows me, it makes me feel uncomfortable. I'm gonna cry out things about my self, my own secrets, my own suffer...
when I do that, I don't seek comfort... no hugs... no pats....
still I think they are warm and benefit.... but I can't accept them from anyone, and I'm still not sure if I'll have one..
for now, I just wanna cry....
-by the way, that's why I feel lost when I see someone crys, I don't if I should treat her/him with what's supposed or how I like to be treated!- ...
just leave me alone. I tend to hold back when there's someone around, it's stupid and not good for me.... so, just leave me alone for now! it's much better...
--
though I don't like it, but I do want them -my dear ones- somehow to know... to know that: hey, right now I'm in a real pain. it hurts...
I don't need to be cheered up, don't worry.... I can do that my self... I just want someone to listen..
I don't look for my cell phone if I wanted to cry,.... but if I were to be caught, I mean if someone close to me called when I was feeling super down...
I tried it once, and it helped me relax a bit.... heh, I don't remember what exactly happened, it was a short call though, but maybe just hearing her voice calmed me as if I confessed half of my feelings to her. sigh, it's such a pity to have a bad memory like mine, though it's not like I want to experience those sad feelings again.
-------
a way to take out these feelings...
family will not do,..... friends,.. sometimes will do, and sometimes won't...
even though, it'll just be crying.... I won't be able to open my mouth easily...
and it would be better if the other party responds with silence..
strangers will not do..... I mean even when I cry and have this long argument going on within myself, I use -without me noticing- another language!! funny, isn't it?
--------------
I'm tired... I know that when I wake up tomorrow inshallah, I'll come back to my old happy self like nothing has happened, but I know also that there will be a next... it's rarely, 1-4 times in a year.. but it'll come...
there was a time when I experienced a strong one, made me feel very empty.... and it was quite scary.
if I weren't a muslim, I would have committed suicide by then!! I can't say it was stupid, because back then it felt very horrible! I don't know how I got to feel like that, and I don't remember the exact circumstances, maybe it's better to just forget about it...
thanks to my sister somi-chan, I got more calm after confessing to her. it was my first time doing that, strangely, I don't remember how I ended up saying that to her.
----------------
I know that life is not easy,but still..... I hate those parts of myslef.. I hate the way my realistic brain start to analyse the data as soon as I finish crying and settle down, it try to looks at the way I cried, trying to come with some judgments and save the informations in a way like: oh, this is gonna be useful when I write that part of my novel, hmm how did I looked? I wonder.. there was a mirror, but my teary eyes were in the way + my bad sight..... it may works though in a rainy scene...
and so on....
it makes me look fake.. disgusting!
is it an automatic way to forget what I had been through?..... I may be a little thankful for that, my brain likes it but my heart really hates it....
that's why I'm locked in a forever argument between those two,..... I'm already tired..
I just remembered that I once wished to be able to experience all different emotions... because I was young and have no experience in life, and still I'm...
I wanted that wish to help write good stories, with touching feelings that get easily to the readers.
now I'm kind of regretful...... thinking: what a stupid wish was that?
but I'm sure tomorrow I will say the opposite..
it's scary, the way I think, it's quite scary...
what a cruel way to treat my own feelings....
I want to have a moment with my God in peace..
I really want to be alone in my room
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Happppyy SUMMER vacation!
hello everybody, it's been a long time since my last post.
doing well?
* thanks god, my net connection was upgraded, it's way faster than before! 200 mb in 20 mints (in average) XD, and I can enjoy youtube videos finally !
* thanks god, too, I passed the exams successfully.
* I turned 19 <3!! exactly at 17/ 6 ! well, at that day, when I saw the alarm I felt really strange. I kinda didn't like the shape of number 19, it's not like being 18, neither 20.then I spent my time thinking about my life and what have I achieved, well, it wasn't just thinking, my voice was really loud, people could call me crazy if my little sister was not around in the room!
I've learned and experienced lots and different emotions, feelings... I think it's a good thing, and I believe that it's gonna help me in the future. but it did make suffer some times... you know, feelings can be happy or sad.
I think I become a little mature.......... and grow a bit taller =D!
srsly, I have this feeling that I stretched at least 1 nanometer U,U !!! well, I don't know my old tall measurement, so I can't say for sure. I wonder if I stopped growing already, but I really don't want that T_T! I want to enter the 160s range!
* there was something....I can't remember it though >_>;
* tried some kind of chocolate recipe, I did it correctly, but the taste didn't worth it that much.. yeah, kinda disappointing, it lacked the proper sweetness.
* my dear friend's birthday, it was at 10/ 7... was thinking of turning the failure in the previous event into a gift ( send her a photo), but I failed, although my ideas were great >,>
* we through a party for my little brother. he finished high school finally! we bought him some expensive gifts ( bye bye my money _^_; ), hope he liked them anyway!
* (bye bye for now, my saving-for-the-sony-laptop money!) since my big sister, Soomi-chan, wedding was near, my parents were short in hands, so they borrow from me. I don't mind lending my parents at all, rather, I feel happy doing so. but I really hate it when I ask them to give it back.usually I'll just wait till they remember. but this time, since I need to buy a laptop ASAP, I'll have to ask them when they get their salary. a very hard dislikable mission!
* Thursday15/7 , it's Soomi-chan's Wedding!!
the wedding was really tiring! it was meant to be early, starts from 4 pm ends 8 pm. but because of different reasons, the time stretched, and the bride didn't show up in the hall till it's 10:30 pm!! cause of that, my dear friend (the only friend who came) couldn't attend the whole party, she even didn't got the chance to have dinner T^T! I really HATE wedding parties, where I have to put these VERY heavy paints on my face till it feels like it's not me! I'll make sure things don't go this way next time inshallah! I think I need to learn more how to put the make-up my self, rather than going to these crazy saloons. oh, let's just forget about it >_>;!
* the house do look more emptier and everyday it feels like something is missing. I miss my sister already <,<....
* I tried the program Paint Tool Sai, it's very amazing XD!
* I downloaded some k-dramas :)!!
- I finished Stars Falling from the Sky : it was good and fun :) , the first episodes -starting from the 2nd- were really touching, made me cry a bit!
- I'm about to finish Oh! My lady, I'll talk about it later.
- waiting in the list: Coffe House, Bad Guy .. hope they are fun, too.
* and I discovered some good mangas :D, let's talk about this later, too
that's all for now
see ya soon inshallah :)
doing well?
yeah, it's summer time, finally. though it started officially a month ago, it's finally begun, for me.
lots of things have happened during that time:
* thanks god, my net connection was upgraded, it's way faster than before! 200 mb in 20 mints (in average) XD, and I can enjoy youtube videos finally !
* thanks god, too, I passed the exams successfully.
* I turned 19 <3!! exactly at 17/ 6 ! well, at that day, when I saw the alarm I felt really strange. I kinda didn't like the shape of number 19, it's not like being 18, neither 20.then I spent my time thinking about my life and what have I achieved, well, it wasn't just thinking, my voice was really loud, people could call me crazy if my little sister was not around in the room!
I've learned and experienced lots and different emotions, feelings... I think it's a good thing, and I believe that it's gonna help me in the future. but it did make suffer some times... you know, feelings can be happy or sad.
I think I become a little mature.......... and grow a bit taller =D!
srsly, I have this feeling that I stretched at least 1 nanometer U,U !!! well, I don't know my old tall measurement, so I can't say for sure. I wonder if I stopped growing already, but I really don't want that T_T! I want to enter the 160s range!
* there was something....I can't remember it though >_>;
* tried some kind of chocolate recipe, I did it correctly, but the taste didn't worth it that much.. yeah, kinda disappointing, it lacked the proper sweetness.
* my dear friend's birthday, it was at 10/ 7... was thinking of turning the failure in the previous event into a gift ( send her a photo), but I failed, although my ideas were great >,>
* we through a party for my little brother. he finished high school finally! we bought him some expensive gifts ( bye bye my money _^_; ), hope he liked them anyway!
* (bye bye for now, my saving-for-the-sony-laptop money!) since my big sister, Soomi-chan, wedding was near, my parents were short in hands, so they borrow from me. I don't mind lending my parents at all, rather, I feel happy doing so. but I really hate it when I ask them to give it back.usually I'll just wait till they remember. but this time, since I need to buy a laptop ASAP, I'll have to ask them when they get their salary. a very hard dislikable mission!
* Thursday15/7 , it's Soomi-chan's Wedding!!
the wedding was really tiring! it was meant to be early, starts from 4 pm ends 8 pm. but because of different reasons, the time stretched, and the bride didn't show up in the hall till it's 10:30 pm!! cause of that, my dear friend (the only friend who came) couldn't attend the whole party, she even didn't got the chance to have dinner T^T! I really HATE wedding parties, where I have to put these VERY heavy paints on my face till it feels like it's not me! I'll make sure things don't go this way next time inshallah! I think I need to learn more how to put the make-up my self, rather than going to these crazy saloons. oh, let's just forget about it >_>;!
* the house do look more emptier and everyday it feels like something is missing. I miss my sister already <,<....
* I tried the program Paint Tool Sai, it's very amazing XD!
* I downloaded some k-dramas :)!!
- I finished Stars Falling from the Sky : it was good and fun :) , the first episodes -starting from the 2nd- were really touching, made me cry a bit!
- I'm about to finish Oh! My lady, I'll talk about it later.
- waiting in the list: Coffe House, Bad Guy .. hope they are fun, too.
* and I discovered some good mangas :D, let's talk about this later, too
that's all for now
see ya soon inshallah :)
Thursday, June 3, 2010
one week before the finals...
hello menasan :), genki desuka?
it's been a week. regarding my sister's matter, it went through somehow, though she still hasn't said anything about it, she seems alright now, thanks God. she's not finished yet, she still has to do the thesis of her project, wish her good luck.
my chemistry lab final exam is this saturday. it's just the theoretical part. I'm already done with the practical part, and thanks God, it went well I guess, though I did a very unexpected, stupid, shocking..(etc.) thing, I bet none out there had done such a thing before O~O", I don't think they discovered the crime I committed >~>" , well, I was prepared to admit it if that happened, but thankfully, it didn't _^_"...
the purpose of the experiment was to find the unknown-concentration of the acid by applying a titration between that acid (known volume) and a known-concentration base. from the titration we can get the volume of the base, and then we apply the equation: (M×V)acid=(M×V)base . we used some indicators like phenolphthalein to help us find the end point, the point where the color turn pink or disappears. a very simple experiment compared to the other one we had in the course.
the first thing you do before starting your experiment is washing the equipment you're about to use with distilled water, right?!
ok, now listen to what this silly girl did:
I looked at the bench in front of me. there were some distilled water bottles over it, the very small one attracted my eyes so I took it -don't ask me why- and started washing all my equipments with it. after I finished, leaving no single drop in that small bottle, I asked the teacher for the base NaOH (the one we used) to add it to my burette. as soon as the solution touched the burette it turned pink! which means that it wasn't clean, and only the phenolphthalein could do such a thing to a base! the teacher said that it could be because the previous group didn't wash their tools clean after they used them, and I agreed frowning my eyebrows, talking to my self, who was the stupid who put the ph.ph in the burette instead of putting it on the flask, and i was troubled cleaning the long tube with another -large this time- distilled water bottle... worrying about the exam time I'm wasting by redoing that..
did u guess what I did?... I bet you did _^_"
yeah, the one who did that was ME! and that little cute bottle contained ph.ph NOT distilled water @_@!
I figured that when I needed to add the indicator, and the bottle they brought me was just like the one I've just finished on cleaning the whole tools with!!
I froze for a moment, trying to understand the horrible thing I did, and when I came to my sense, I hurried up and re-clean the other things again, assuring my self : don't panic, girl! it's just an indicator and it won't affect the results! take a deep breath, just focus! you still didn't do the first round so hurry up and do it! (we had to re-do it three times to confirm the results) if they found about the empty bottle, be brave and confess >_<", other than that just be quiet and shut up, and complete your damn experiment properly ><"!!
thanks God, I got the concentration right, though I may not get the full mark. I hope they didn't find about the ph.ph accident >_>, it's a 25 marks!! and we had to fill just small 8 boxes in the results table we got , so I REALLY don't know how are they going to distribute such many marks on a very short simple exam!
I'm a little worried...
anyway, I have to focus on the remaining, and forget those I finished..
oh yeah, I just remembered this, our Physics club has a huge event that will be held in the start of next term -after summer vacation-..we're gonna represent the history line of the scientists who contributes to develop physics from the very old past till now! and guess what, there're customs!! yes, we're gonna cosplay =D! I'm soo excited!! I still didn't choose any scientist yet :( , I don't know who will be the best for me, I'll try to search for those whom I fully understand their achievements and works. unfortunately, all the famous ones have been taken (Albert Einstein, Newton) there's still Maxwell, though. but I don't like elctromagnatic that much, it was because of the #@$! doctor who gave us the course, I know it's a very important field, so I'll try to study the book (zamensky) again in the vacation. back to our main topic, does anyone know if there was some kind of quiz about scientists i could take, may be it'll help me get some ideas about the suitable scientist for me.. I'll try to search now.
I'll tell you when I figure it out :)
see ya another time, inshaallah <3.
wish me good luck!
and I got this:
try it out if you're interested, and tell me what you got :D!
it's been a week. regarding my sister's matter, it went through somehow, though she still hasn't said anything about it, she seems alright now, thanks God. she's not finished yet, she still has to do the thesis of her project, wish her good luck.
my chemistry lab final exam is this saturday. it's just the theoretical part. I'm already done with the practical part, and thanks God, it went well I guess, though I did a very unexpected, stupid, shocking..(etc.) thing, I bet none out there had done such a thing before O~O", I don't think they discovered the crime I committed >~>" , well, I was prepared to admit it if that happened, but thankfully, it didn't _^_"...
the purpose of the experiment was to find the unknown-concentration of the acid by applying a titration between that acid (known volume) and a known-concentration base. from the titration we can get the volume of the base, and then we apply the equation: (M×V)acid=(M×V)base . we used some indicators like phenolphthalein to help us find the end point, the point where the color turn pink or disappears. a very simple experiment compared to the other one we had in the course.
the first thing you do before starting your experiment is washing the equipment you're about to use with distilled water, right?!
ok, now listen to what this silly girl did:
I looked at the bench in front of me. there were some distilled water bottles over it, the very small one attracted my eyes so I took it -don't ask me why- and started washing all my equipments with it. after I finished, leaving no single drop in that small bottle, I asked the teacher for the base NaOH (the one we used) to add it to my burette. as soon as the solution touched the burette it turned pink! which means that it wasn't clean, and only the phenolphthalein could do such a thing to a base! the teacher said that it could be because the previous group didn't wash their tools clean after they used them, and I agreed frowning my eyebrows, talking to my self, who was the stupid who put the ph.ph in the burette instead of putting it on the flask, and i was troubled cleaning the long tube with another -large this time- distilled water bottle... worrying about the exam time I'm wasting by redoing that..
did u guess what I did?... I bet you did _^_"
yeah, the one who did that was ME! and that little cute bottle contained ph.ph NOT distilled water @_@!
I figured that when I needed to add the indicator, and the bottle they brought me was just like the one I've just finished on cleaning the whole tools with!!
I froze for a moment, trying to understand the horrible thing I did, and when I came to my sense, I hurried up and re-clean the other things again, assuring my self : don't panic, girl! it's just an indicator and it won't affect the results! take a deep breath, just focus! you still didn't do the first round so hurry up and do it! (we had to re-do it three times to confirm the results) if they found about the empty bottle, be brave and confess >_<", other than that just be quiet and shut up, and complete your damn experiment properly ><"!!
thanks God, I got the concentration right, though I may not get the full mark. I hope they didn't find about the ph.ph accident >_>, it's a 25 marks!! and we had to fill just small 8 boxes in the results table we got , so I REALLY don't know how are they going to distribute such many marks on a very short simple exam!
I'm a little worried...
anyway, I have to focus on the remaining, and forget those I finished..
oh yeah, I just remembered this, our Physics club has a huge event that will be held in the start of next term -after summer vacation-..we're gonna represent the history line of the scientists who contributes to develop physics from the very old past till now! and guess what, there're customs!! yes, we're gonna cosplay =D! I'm soo excited!! I still didn't choose any scientist yet :( , I don't know who will be the best for me, I'll try to search for those whom I fully understand their achievements and works. unfortunately, all the famous ones have been taken (Albert Einstein, Newton) there's still Maxwell, though. but I don't like elctromagnatic that much, it was because of the #@$! doctor who gave us the course, I know it's a very important field, so I'll try to study the book (zamensky) again in the vacation. back to our main topic, does anyone know if there was some kind of quiz about scientists i could take, may be it'll help me get some ideas about the suitable scientist for me.. I'll try to search now.
I'll tell you when I figure it out :)
see ya another time, inshaallah <3.
wish me good luck!
------- [EDIT] --------
I've just done a funny quiz :D, Which Physics Thing Are You?
and I got this:
You are the String Theory. You are very random and spontaneous and just plain nuts. No one knowns what you will do next. You like to baffle people and confuse the heck out of those scientists. Haha, you love anamolies. Don't worry, so do I. ;)
(14 other people got this result! That's 41% )
hahaha, didn't expect it at all xD!try it out if you're interested, and tell me what you got :D!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
extremely worried...
my sister's already home. she came yesterday night at 8, looks like she locked her self in the guest room, that's why I didn't know immediately when she came.
just what did happen?! it's 9 in the morning and she's still there, only her bag flew to her room somehow. omg, I'm getting crazy. I can only imagine bad things. just how much bad was it?! to what far?!
this's the first time she's done such a thing. even when she do bad in an exam, she come to her room with a funny expression on her face: "oh, I'm dead! be prepared guys, I may repeat this year <3!"-or something around that-
oh, just tell me how much bad?!! this's terrible, very terrible. what should I do? I think we better leave her alone, but it's already this long. is she fine? did she eat? oh god, is it ok to just leave her like that? what kind of comfort does she need? just tell me what exactly did happen in the first place?!
shall I try to ask one of her friends? no, I don't think she'd welcome that.
this is very bad! very very bad.
oh, may god be with her.
hey, come out, sou-chan. we're all worried about u. whatever happened, everything is gonna be ok, so please come out and relax properly in your bed. I've a lot of great dramas you must watch, even somi-chan's enjoyed them :) ! let us hear about the great adventure you had yesterday, or just forget all about it.
may god be with u
just what did happen?! it's 9 in the morning and she's still there, only her bag flew to her room somehow. omg, I'm getting crazy. I can only imagine bad things. just how much bad was it?! to what far?!
this's the first time she's done such a thing. even when she do bad in an exam, she come to her room with a funny expression on her face: "oh, I'm dead! be prepared guys, I may repeat this year <3!"-or something around that-
oh, just tell me how much bad?!! this's terrible, very terrible. what should I do? I think we better leave her alone, but it's already this long. is she fine? did she eat? oh god, is it ok to just leave her like that? what kind of comfort does she need? just tell me what exactly did happen in the first place?!
shall I try to ask one of her friends? no, I don't think she'd welcome that.
this is very bad! very very bad.
oh, may god be with her.
hey, come out, sou-chan. we're all worried about u. whatever happened, everything is gonna be ok, so please come out and relax properly in your bed. I've a lot of great dramas you must watch, even somi-chan's enjoyed them :) ! let us hear about the great adventure you had yesterday, or just forget all about it.
may god be with u
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
It's Wednesday, Yay! Happy weekend :D!
Hello everybody, how do u do :D?!
changed the BG color, it hurt my eyes when reading the text, and I think you did felt that too.. tell me if this one is OK? wait did it change?
this week was ok, thanks god. the mechanics exam was great, though I may lose one mark over a stupid thing, *sigh* what's done, is done. there's nothing to do about it >_>.
the question was about finding the phase difference of the motion equation, u can find it using the tan inverse of some quantities. everything went ok in the beginning, I understood the trick, made some stupid mistakes in the substituting part but fixed them immediately. after being through all these obstacles, I chose the wrong answer!!
it was first like this: tan @ = (2 / -3) , where @ is the required angle.
when I got this result, I put in my mind the quarter the angle @ should be located in. (by the way: tan @ = sin @ / cos @ ). u can see that the angle is in the 2nd quarter where the sine function is positive but the cosine is negative. so, after I found the angle using the tan inverse of (2 / 3), the result will be in the 1st Quarter, which means that I had to add 180 to that result, to get the required answer correctly.
now, did you guess what was my mistake _^_ ? I'll tell ya. it was about this 180 thing. the first time I added the quantity to the angle I freaked out, I don't know how I saw the resulting number -in the calculator- greater than 180 (if it was true, it'll be then in the 3rd Quarter not in the 2nd) so I thought that I must be wrong about the transformation, and it could be + 90, not + 180 !!!
I remember it was 148 or something, how could this be larger than 180!! unless I read it 184 ?!!
in these cases, I used to try it on some famous angle to make sure the method is correct, so I really don't know why I didn't try to that and why I didn't re-calculate again!
this's how I lost the mark! it was a multi-choices Q . I wouldn't care if it was just a simple question, but it did had some kind of trick behind it, so yeah, you can say that it hurt my pride a little bit :P !
thanks god anyway, I could successfuly solve the other problems :)
and sorry for this long, un-understandable mess, really sorry >.> ...
ehm, let's talk about another thing =D"..
ah, my sister's having a seminar today, it's what they call hmm graduating project? paper? don't laugh! I don't know what they call it in Arabic, and u want me to phrase it in english >O>"
I'll appreciate it if u tell me the right words please _^_..
anyway, wish her the best! though I think it's already ended by now, still, wish her get the best results!
first of all, it's in english, and she didn't practise well. and of course, she got a bunch of merciless doctors in front of her, ready to attack with questions like monsters. she also got a horrible partner, because of that, all the work is on her, even the power point show of that girl presentation, she did it for her! (she claimed that she can't take her laptop out of the dorm where she live so she can't do it. but then, can't she just do it there?!! it doesn't have to be in the university!)
not just that, there is more and more, makes your blood boils inside your veins! yesterday, she only cared about fixing her part of the presentation till it got perfect, ignoring my sister and her part as if she meant nothing, she memorized her part very well, though she used to play the pessimistic fellow adding more pressure on my sister and even making the others think that my sister is the bad girl, who don't care about the project process.. and here's the shocking truth, that girl is the top student in her group!! someone u never expect to be this lame! at least, don't she care about the marks she may lose if she got wrong lab results because of her half-heartedly treated samples! really, if my sister wasn't around, I'm sure the samples would give unbelievable results!!
no, my sister's not the weak type. it's just that she couldn't figure her true color early enough to think of the best way to deal with her. she had a completely different image of her, just got it corrected yesterday, and today is their last day together! I should treat my sister to some restaurant, whatever the results were. she fought patiently and it was really tough. but I believe in her, she surely did well. and I believe that god won't let her hard work go to waste.
hopefully, looks like her supervisor's recognized her skills, got an idea of who is working and who is slacking .
she still didn't get back home, it's 9 pm now.. come back already girl!
I'm about to finish Beautiful Life, I've all the episodes, and only have to watch the last one. looks like the main girl is gonna die, this's a bit annoying.. >_>
the 3rd ep of Tsuki no Koibito is out already, and my torrent is turned on for downloading. got 11 hours to go <_<..
hope oh samp! group finish translating it soon...
see ya later guys, have a happy weekend :)
changed the BG color, it hurt my eyes when reading the text, and I think you did felt that too.. tell me if this one is OK? wait did it change?
this week was ok, thanks god. the mechanics exam was great, though I may lose one mark over a stupid thing, *sigh* what's done, is done. there's nothing to do about it >_>.
the question was about finding the phase difference of the motion equation, u can find it using the tan inverse of some quantities. everything went ok in the beginning, I understood the trick, made some stupid mistakes in the substituting part but fixed them immediately. after being through all these obstacles, I chose the wrong answer!!
it was first like this: tan @ = (2 / -3) , where @ is the required angle.
when I got this result, I put in my mind the quarter the angle @ should be located in. (by the way: tan @ = sin @ / cos @ ). u can see that the angle is in the 2nd quarter where the sine function is positive but the cosine is negative. so, after I found the angle using the tan inverse of (2 / 3), the result will be in the 1st Quarter, which means that I had to add 180 to that result, to get the required answer correctly.
now, did you guess what was my mistake _^_ ? I'll tell ya. it was about this 180 thing. the first time I added the quantity to the angle I freaked out, I don't know how I saw the resulting number -in the calculator- greater than 180 (if it was true, it'll be then in the 3rd Quarter not in the 2nd) so I thought that I must be wrong about the transformation, and it could be + 90, not + 180 !!!
I remember it was 148 or something, how could this be larger than 180!! unless I read it 184 ?!!
in these cases, I used to try it on some famous angle to make sure the method is correct, so I really don't know why I didn't try to that and why I didn't re-calculate again!
this's how I lost the mark! it was a multi-choices Q . I wouldn't care if it was just a simple question, but it did had some kind of trick behind it, so yeah, you can say that it hurt my pride a little bit :P !
thanks god anyway, I could successfuly solve the other problems :)
and sorry for this long, un-understandable mess, really sorry >.> ...
ehm, let's talk about another thing =D"..
ah, my sister's having a seminar today, it's what they call hmm graduating project? paper? don't laugh! I don't know what they call it in Arabic, and u want me to phrase it in english >O>"
I'll appreciate it if u tell me the right words please _^_..
anyway, wish her the best! though I think it's already ended by now, still, wish her get the best results!
first of all, it's in english, and she didn't practise well. and of course, she got a bunch of merciless doctors in front of her, ready to attack with questions like monsters. she also got a horrible partner, because of that, all the work is on her, even the power point show of that girl presentation, she did it for her! (she claimed that she can't take her laptop out of the dorm where she live so she can't do it. but then, can't she just do it there?!! it doesn't have to be in the university!)
not just that, there is more and more, makes your blood boils inside your veins! yesterday, she only cared about fixing her part of the presentation till it got perfect, ignoring my sister and her part as if she meant nothing, she memorized her part very well, though she used to play the pessimistic fellow adding more pressure on my sister and even making the others think that my sister is the bad girl, who don't care about the project process.. and here's the shocking truth, that girl is the top student in her group!! someone u never expect to be this lame! at least, don't she care about the marks she may lose if she got wrong lab results because of her half-heartedly treated samples! really, if my sister wasn't around, I'm sure the samples would give unbelievable results!!
no, my sister's not the weak type. it's just that she couldn't figure her true color early enough to think of the best way to deal with her. she had a completely different image of her, just got it corrected yesterday, and today is their last day together! I should treat my sister to some restaurant, whatever the results were. she fought patiently and it was really tough. but I believe in her, she surely did well. and I believe that god won't let her hard work go to waste.
hopefully, looks like her supervisor's recognized her skills, got an idea of who is working and who is slacking .
she still didn't get back home, it's 9 pm now.. come back already girl!
I'm about to finish Beautiful Life, I've all the episodes, and only have to watch the last one. looks like the main girl is gonna die, this's a bit annoying.. >_>
the 3rd ep of Tsuki no Koibito is out already, and my torrent is turned on for downloading. got 11 hours to go <_<..
hope oh samp! group finish translating it soon...
see ya later guys, have a happy weekend :)
Saturday, May 22, 2010
exam & downloads.. J-drama VS K-drama?
As-salamu Alaukum (May peace be with you) !
hello again! how do you do :D?!
I have an exam today, wish me best luck >.<"!
recently, the net in my house's been such a pain, I can't download anything properly. in the beginning, it goes nice and well, just leave it for half an hour and come back to find it stopped for unknown reasons! sometimes it reachs 70% or 80% and then doesn't make it...
if this continues, I'll waste a lot of time, and I won't finish the drama in one week as planned!
(by the way, it's the J-drama: Beautiful Life, though I'm not a J-drama fan, but I think Kimura Takuya is an amazing actor!)
TOT!
hope it downloads now smoothly without any stops..
I hope the exam goes well, too..
see ya
the exam was fine though I may not get the full mark, but thanks god anyway.
I have (mechanics I) this monday, and some HW due to tuesday & wednesday. I'm gonna be busy this week, so I shall finish them all today.
unfortunately, I couldn't download the 2ed part of ep 4 of the drama (the part I struggled with its download the whole night!)
argh! it's just a 100 mb file, what's wrong with this stupid connection >[]< ?!!!
*sigh* I'll try again >_>..
now, let's talk a little about the drama, or about the lead actor: Kimura Takuya...
because of him, i changed my extremely negative opinion about J-drama, and they gain some of my acceptance. of course I'm only talking about dramas by him only. his acting skills are unique. I first saw him in: Pride , and instantaneously was attracted to his acting ( though I really don't feel comfortable now when I see his face,..why does it give me the creeps o_O?! hmm,.. maybe I'm a little confused. it could be my hatred toward the character he's playing in Tsuki no Koibito, that selfish big jerk president!)
anyway, let's continue the story: so I was really surprised: Oh, finally!! I found a J-actor who could make me feel the drama, makes me forget that it's just some acting! ( J-drama's fans: *_____* ) ( err.. looks like I'm digging my own grave _^_" *gulps* )
ehm, where were we? ah, now let's look at k-dramas. they usually are good. they give u a normal, realistic feeling, not fake or forced.. or perfect in a weird way!.. I don't know how to express it well.
hmm...about the J-actors, their movements and actions remind me of that of anime's characters and manga's. this's one of the main reasons I couldn't accept them... they didn't seem real to me.
anyway, I kind of reached a conclusion (about J-drama): say NO for university, high school students dramas, they are so pathic U_U'' *touch the back of her neck* it.. hurts? *eyes shine at the far corner* eek! what was that o_O?!
back, the only ones I'll try to consider are those where the leading actors are around (28,29,30~ years old)! other than that, it'd be better to watch the manga version -if found-. it's always the best (even more than the anime).
(the leading actress, Shinohara Ryoko, is amazing, as good as Kimura. but the guy acting with her is no better than those I hate the most -those in the neglected group I specified above- >_>) as a story, it was ok.
* Pride : (by Kimura. but I didn't like the actress, from the very beginning, she didn't seem like a stupid innocent woman to me at all -if that's what's her character was supposed to be- ... well, I didn't like her >,>" )
* Tsuki no Koibito (Moon Lovers) : currently airing (both of Kimura and Shinohara Ryoko are here, Yay :D!! it looks promising, I really wish for it to be a good drama -watched 2 eps till now- )
* Beautiful Life : didn't finish watching it, the one I'm downloading right now. w-wait a minuTE! NOOO! THIS SUCKS!! it's just reached 50% then STOPPED without warning, WaHAHAAAAaa, I'm gonna diee... T[]T
(*sniff* by Kimura, too. there are rapidshare links here if u want to download. I watched 3 eps till NOW *sniff*. it looks promising as well ;_; )
I'm planning to watch more of Kimura's dramas.. but I've to focus now on the coming exams.. >_>
and yeah, tell me what do you think :D?! + please pray for that @#$"*^ download to complete safely :)!!
hmm, I should talk about K-drama, maybe in another post.
this is all I've got today, see ya tomorrow inshalla..
hello again! how do you do :D?!
I have an exam today, wish me best luck >.<"!
recently, the net in my house's been such a pain, I can't download anything properly. in the beginning, it goes nice and well, just leave it for half an hour and come back to find it stopped for unknown reasons! sometimes it reachs 70% or 80% and then doesn't make it...
if this continues, I'll waste a lot of time, and I won't finish the drama in one week as planned!
(by the way, it's the J-drama: Beautiful Life, though I'm not a J-drama fan, but I think Kimura Takuya is an amazing actor!)
TOT!
hope it downloads now smoothly without any stops..
I hope the exam goes well, too..
see ya
----------------
[I'm Back!]
the exam was fine though I may not get the full mark, but thanks god anyway.
I have (mechanics I) this monday, and some HW due to tuesday & wednesday. I'm gonna be busy this week, so I shall finish them all today.
unfortunately, I couldn't download the 2ed part of ep 4 of the drama (the part I struggled with its download the whole night!)
argh! it's just a 100 mb file, what's wrong with this stupid connection >[]< ?!!!
*sigh* I'll try again >_>..
now, let's talk a little about the drama, or about the lead actor: Kimura Takuya...
because of him, i changed my extremely negative opinion about J-drama, and they gain some of my acceptance. of course I'm only talking about dramas by him only. his acting skills are unique. I first saw him in: Pride , and instantaneously was attracted to his acting ( though I really don't feel comfortable now when I see his face,..why does it give me the creeps o_O?! hmm,.. maybe I'm a little confused. it could be my hatred toward the character he's playing in Tsuki no Koibito, that selfish big jerk president!)
anyway, let's continue the story: so I was really surprised: Oh, finally!! I found a J-actor who could make me feel the drama, makes me forget that it's just some acting! ( J-drama's fans: *_____* ) ( err.. looks like I'm digging my own grave _^_" *gulps* )
ehm, where were we? ah, now let's look at k-dramas. they usually are good. they give u a normal, realistic feeling, not fake or forced.. or perfect in a weird way!.. I don't know how to express it well.
hmm...about the J-actors, their movements and actions remind me of that of anime's characters and manga's. this's one of the main reasons I couldn't accept them... they didn't seem real to me.
anyway, I kind of reached a conclusion (about J-drama): say NO for university, high school students dramas, they are so pathic U_U'' *touch the back of her neck* it.. hurts? *eyes shine at the far corner* eek! what was that o_O?!
back, the only ones I'll try to consider are those where the leading actors are around (28,29,30~ years old)! other than that, it'd be better to watch the manga version -if found-. it's always the best (even more than the anime).
now, since the J-drama I like are really limited, I'll list them here for u:
* Anego : 
(the leading actress, Shinohara Ryoko, is amazing, as good as Kimura. but the guy acting with her is no better than those I hate the most -those in the neglected group I specified above- >_>) as a story, it was ok.
* Pride : (by Kimura. but I didn't like the actress, from the very beginning, she didn't seem like a stupid innocent woman to me at all -if that's what's her character was supposed to be- ... well, I didn't like her >,>" )
* Tsuki no Koibito (Moon Lovers) : currently airing (both of Kimura and Shinohara Ryoko are here, Yay :D!! it looks promising, I really wish for it to be a good drama -watched 2 eps till now- )
* Beautiful Life : didn't finish watching it, the one I'm downloading right now. w-wait a minuTE! NOOO! THIS SUCKS!! it's just reached 50% then STOPPED without warning, WaHAHAAAAaa, I'm gonna diee... T[]T
(*sniff* by Kimura, too. there are rapidshare links here if u want to download. I watched 3 eps till NOW *sniff*. it looks promising as well ;_; )
I'm planning to watch more of Kimura's dramas.. but I've to focus now on the coming exams.. >_>
and yeah, tell me what do you think :D?! + please pray for that @#$"*^ download to complete safely :)!!
hmm, I should talk about K-drama, maybe in another post.
this is all I've got today, see ya tomorrow inshalla..
PS: sorry if some words sounds weird, I'm trying to express my mind the best I could with my poor english..
Thursday, May 20, 2010
try some quizzes.. =D?
hi again, I just did some quizzes from quizilla.. they were simple but fun =D!
here are the quizzes and my results:
2. which day of the week are you?
I got:
heh, I was a bit surprise when I got this one, specially when I answered the last Q without hesitation: BED!
I want to be right now in my bed! * yawn* it's getting pretty late >_>"
---------------------------
3.How emotional are you?
my result:
here are the quizzes and my results:
------------------------------The love of Light
Your an extremely caring person, and will do anything to make sure your friends and family are safe, protected and together. Your warm, and always a joy to be around!(15922 other people got this result! That's 31%)
2. which day of the week are you?
I got:
Thursday
Optimistic, a bit ditzy, and generous. You're a nice person, and you like to think rationally and logically.(7261 other people got this result! That's 17%)
heh, I was a bit surprise when I got this one, specially when I answered the last Q without hesitation: BED!
I want to be right now in my bed! * yawn* it's getting pretty late >_>"
---------------------------
3.How emotional are you?
my result:
Your cool
You may be emotional at times but you know how to control yourself in front of people. Good job!(25803 other people got this result! That's 30% )
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Hi there =D!
As salamu Alaukum (May the peace be with you) !
Hi everybody, how do you do?
oh, it's my first post! well, hope there'll be more in the near future
I had a mid exam today, but thanks God, I gauss I did fine!
it's time for the Aser prayer, I gott go now
I'll upload the blog later..
see ya =D
Hi everybody, how do you do?
oh, it's my first post! well, hope there'll be more in the near future
I had a mid exam today, but thanks God, I gauss I did fine!
it's time for the Aser prayer, I gott go now
I'll upload the blog later..
see ya =D
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